Life Cycle of Me

Poyo je tajuk..hehehe..aku sebenarnye tgh bosan. Ase nk cuti dan tengok filem cinta yg membuak2. Heheh.. Nk mkn pose la plak. Esok last day pose. Insyaallah. Memacam dugaan berpuasa ni. Dugaannye ialah perasaan yg lapa. Padahal pg td aku sahur la gak. Sanggup mengorbanan waktu tidor demi takot lapa siang2 ni. Hehehe..   Nk kene buat pengumuman ke? Hehehe...Tapi ramai yg dah tau pn. Alhamdulillah setelah 2 kali test, aku positif pregnant! Tp tak tau la kan, masih terlalu awal utk buat scan. So aku harap takde apa2 la. Stakat ni kene la jaga mkn sikit. Takleh mkn yg bukan2. Sbb takot bende tu tajam. Tp haritu aku tgk mak metua aku cm tak bekenan je tgk aku mkn acar nenas..ekeke...Takleh tahan la. Lgpn acar tu manis...Harap2 takde ape2. Ya Allah slamatkn lah kandunganku. Amin. Huhuhu.   Tadi aku bace blog ArniTheSoulSaver tu. Die tak puas ati sbb org slalu cm tak puas ati nape die taknak anak. Pstu die cite la. Stengah org ade anak pn bising2 anak ni menyusahkan la apa la. Tp...

Ermm..nyum2....tgk resepi sweet sour kt intenet...tak saba nk balik msk lalu berbuka.... Dh masuk hari ke 4 aku berpuasa dibulan syawal ni, alhamdulillah. Nnti last aku pose hari Isnin nextweek kot...Hubby aku mgkin puasa smpai selasa..Insyaallah... Hari2 hujan lebat gila sekarang. Hari2 Hubby aku balik basah kuyup..Kesian die...Aku plak tgh2 msk risau pasal die...Pstu mcm berdoa...wpn hujan, harap2 die balik la jgk...Cmne perasaan kalu die tak dpt balik, ada kerja ke...Hujan lebat sgt ke...msti sayu..Huhuhu..Aku kerap pikir pasal tu sbb aku nk bersedia menghadapi keadaan tu..Huhu.. Wpn ase tenang sbb dpt msk sorg2..Takde la bergaduh berebut Kuali ngn Hubby aku..Tp penat rupenye buat kerja sorg2....Mcm lipas kudung..ekekeke..Pstu tensen je bila Hubby balik ckp...best la skang...br dpt merasa mcm suami...Nk jd suami yg mls la...Ampes je..hehehe..Aku pn tak tau nk respon mcm mana ngn statement die tu....Hihihi...Tp kadang2 die tolong la sket2...Sekadar melepaskan batuk ditangga...Klau ta...

First of all, aku nk ucapkan, Salam Ramadhan untuk semua...Smoga kite sume di limpahi keberkatan di bulan yang mulia ni. Walaupun dh tak smpai sminggu lagi nk Raya, aku br nk post salam Ramadhan ni..Hihihi...Lmbt sikit...Hihihi.... Aku jugak nak mintak maap kat semua kalu aku terkasar bahasa...Kalu aku kasar2 tu mmg nmpk mcm aku benci giler la kt org tu..Muahaha..tp sbenanye aku tak benci pn....Aku luahkan supaya to get even..Maknanya org tu dpt 1...Aku pn dpt 1...Kire fair la...Tule aku ni..Ego sgt...Seboleh2 nk mengfair kn ke adaan...Kalu aku rasa org tu dh sakitkn aku..Aku akan sakitkn org tu balik...Kalu aku rasa org tu berbuat baik ngn aku..Aku buat baik balik ngn die...Tule 1 peel aku yg aku sukar nk ubah...huhuhuhu.....Mak aku penah ckp...Kalu aku ego sgt...bole jd giler..ehehehe....Tp nk wt cemana....Kalu aku ubah aku ase aku bole jg giler...ehehehe..Kadang2 aku malas nk layan aku diam kn je la..tp kadang2 tu jarang sgt la berlaku....... Kembali kepada topik asal....Bulan yang ...

I always end up like this, starting something and then I don’t know how to end it. Ok la. Let see what I can do to continue the journey. After hearing my father about bringing his parents to my house, my Bf smells something fishy about the meeting. So he starts moving slower. When I ask or persuade him, when will he brings his parents? So I can tell my father and mother about it. Though, I had actually shot a date for the so-called meeting ceremony. My Bf felt hesitant about it. I am too excited to realize that he was worried about money. All I can think about is, I want to get married. I want to get married. Hahaha. How desperate, am I? Ok, I guess I couldn’t stand the slow pace of writing this in English. But I’m using word right now, it corrected my mistake instantly..heheh..Ok so lets continue since my bos taknak start meeting, dengki org nk balik cpt!!! Huargh3…. Lepas tu byk kali la kitrog gaduh, nk dijadikan cerita, time tu Kuyu, my Bf la masa tu, now my hubby..Hehehe.. Okla, I...

Actually I had thought about this since yesterday. Did I ever reveal my Tactical Move to anyone? I'm not sure. But even My Closest Friends didn’t know it. From the beginning of Raya last year, I told my BF (at that moment), that he might want to start meeting my parents. Since we never reveal our relationship to my parents, they also confused caused I never specifically told them with whom I was going out with all this while. So I think it's a good time to start meeting them. My BF rejected my opinion at 1st. Because he said, it's not that he was not serious about ‘US’, but he doesn’t want my parents to think that we are ready to get married. He said to me, he had not enough saving to marry me yet. I was sad. But despite that, I got my own saving as a backup. But of course I didn’t tell him. For that backup, I decided to start my strategically planning to trick my own 'Husband to Be' or what do you think I should call him then? hehehe... At first, I convinced him, m...

Pengalaman dirumah ibu mertua. Hehehe... The moment my feet touches the ground, i felt so cold and trembling. Everything seems to be moving around. My hands and feets are shaking. I can barely feel my body. I'm was not inside. I'm so scared and dont know what i will face at my Mother In Law 's house. Huhuhu... Reminded by a friend of mine, there a funny thing happened before we reached to my mother in law's house. On moving our butts there, i as the bride and bridegroom, was feeling weird to drive by ourself to the house. So we ask a friend, matleh to drive for us. And then a friend told us, our car is too small, so we changed to new car of Myvi owned by Gurlz. And then when we already in and ready to go, we dont have any driver for the car, and need to shout(coz we r in a hurry) to matleh to change his position. Once we were ready to get going, my uncle drive by and ask us to join him since his car is bigger (Perdana). My face already sweating and we changed car again ...

Sebenarnye dh lama aku nk story pasal PERKAHWINAN aku yg tak berape nk gempak tu...hehehe....Takdela. Bkn sbb nk bgtau org sgt...tp sbb utk igt kan diri aku sendiri jugak.....AKU DH KAWIN!....hehehe.....So sedar la diri aku sikit.... Hari sebelum nikah tu aku lek lg...Takde rasa apa2 debaran pun.....Member2 aku dok tanya...Aku ckp ade la sikit...Aku pn cm ct nurhaliza gk...HIPOKRIT la org kata....Abih kang kalu aku kate aku tak rase ape2 korg kate aku poyo lak kn...So baik la aku ckp ade la sikit...Sbb mgkin ade la sikit kot....... Pstu aku tolong la mak aku buat persiapan sikit2.....Teman die gi chow kit bli la ape2 yang patut....Still aku tak rase ape2 pun time tu...Cume rase best la dh kawin.....Aku piki yang baik2 je..Lepas kawin takyah la aku gaduh nk kuar dating lagi...dh kuar dating takyah la gaduh nk kene balik...Kene pisah...Best2...Lepas ni umah aku dekat ngn opis senang nk gi keje.......Bestnye la rase time tu.............Aku ade la tepiki kesian kat Ummi aku lepas ni sape l...

Ala...Keyboard ni sensitif sgt la...br tertekan dh die publish tak smpt nk taip ape2...sib baik bole edit...org pn pening tgk tajuk tu...hehehe.... Bese la jumaat...Swingging mood...ecece.....7 days to go man.....I'm still rocking.....ehehehe...pg td aku mimpi ape ntah...tp aku ase mcm there is a man beside me........pstu aku mcm seriau je la...ekekeke..tp blom ade any man yet beside me laa...aku mimpi je......hehehehe... Ok2..stop talking about me...other this is more matters la...hehehe Erm...ada kwn aku ni mula2 aku baca die cite pasal protong....ok la...aku pn benci gk kualiti kete mesia nih....tp dlm masa yg sama..no choice man...heheheheeh pstu die cite pasal hal dunia...tp ampes taknak elaborate......... Tp dunia mmg tgh sakit sgt skang...aku akui la..sbb tu aku malas tgk brite...mcm cite bersiri yg tak berkesudahan...balik2 org mintak derma....derma tu bkn nye kemana pn..ke poket sendiri gk........ampes je.........mmg le aku tak tau sume ni aku men tuduh je....tp ntah la......

Alamak...Spoil betul lah time aku nk up Kad kawin aku ade je la prob. Ish ish ish ..... Akhir nya kad aku siap gak. Alhamdulillah. Macam2 btol dugaan nk kawin ni, sabar je lah eh. Kawan baik aku kat opis, bj nikah die ade prob. Aku lak kad kawin ku..Huhuhuu..Bj nikah aku pn takdela prob ape2. cume aku tak smpt la nk letak2 manik ke ape ke. Selendang aku pn plain giler. Tp tu bkn masalah. Masalah len aku tak igt dh. Tp yg aku paling igt kad aku la. Berzaman nk tunggu siap. Bile dh siap. Wpn org len kate tak lawa la cincai la, aku pn mula2 kata cincai. Tunang aku pn sama. Tp lama2 aku piki balik ni lah titik peluh die, titik peluh aku, so kitrog sebenarnya patut menghargainya. Bialah org nk kata apa kan. wpn bkn nye dorg kate pe pon. hehe..Tp memula segan la jugak. Dh la tak wangi sume..Tp piki2 balik mengarut la tu sume. Aku ngn tunang aku punyela poyo siap ase nk Frame lg kad kawin kitrog. Kenangan sebalik kad tu mahal sgt. Hehehe....Sayang abg....hehee..time kasih sbb Allah temukan ki...

Hari ini hati ini terasa terlalu halus. Bagai butiran kacang hijau menyusuri mulut geguni, keluar dan bertaburan. Jerihnya kalau nak kutip satu per satu bijirin itu. Lalu aku biarkan saja perasaan ini mengalir. Sambil telinga ku membingitkan lagu cinta. Aku tak langsung kebosanan. Malah, jerih ku, sakit ku, pening ku, sepanjang minggu ini terasa reda. Mungkin aku terlalu hanyut dengan Cinta. Tapi tak salah rasanya kalau aku mengaku, yang sepastinya, aku perlukan Cinta. Kerna Cinta, tak kunafikan, aku seorang yang buta. Aku seorang yang pentingkan diri ku sendiri, dan orang yang kucintai itu. Aku jadi kalah dengan permintaannya. Dan sentiasa aku leburkan permintaan orang lain. Bukan paksaanya, tidak sekali-kali. Tapi hati ku yang pasrah. Hati ku yang tamak. 24 jam yang dianugerahi untuk sehari, rasanya ingin aku habiskan bersamanya. Benarkan cinta ku ini? Aku sendiri tak mengerti. Aku cuba bertindak adil. Dengan keluarga, kerja dan kawan-kawan. Tapi selalunya, aku tidak bersama mereka. ...

And still counting... Tak tau sbenanye ape nk berceloteh dlm ni. tp nak update gak..ehehehe Ok 1st nk cite la kot pasal keje...What aku achieve skang..ehehe...Frankly speaking aku hanyalah kuli berbayar....Aku byk buat VB...Pastu documentations...Pastu admin menguruskan programmer2 menghantar Assignment dorg.....Tp tu keje mudah la....Bkn la..aku ase kerani cabuk pn bole buat....And bg org yg kononnya IT cm aku ni ....Adalah mengambil masa 2 3 menet je kot..ehehehe..Tp kalu VB yg susah2 tu lama la jugak..ehehehe..tp aku still ada masa utk chatting kat Gmail...chatting ngn rakan2 sekerja....Browse intenet...pagi2 kadang2 baca paper..kadang2 tak smpt sbb ada meeting....But i learned a lot in doing admin things la.. Tp walau pn mcm hina la..bkn hina apa....Aku tak la mcm kwn2 aku yg bole membanggakan kerja2 yg dorg buat...Tp aku tak kesah...Aku rasa hina sikit la..tp Aku rasa bertuah jugak la..Sbb tak payah la aku perah2 otak sgt...So aku bole la tumpu kat keluarga aku nnti kot... Tapi ta...

Let say, today i dont know what should i write in here. But since i have 25 more minutes before getting back. I would like to scribble a word or two...Hehehe. I am about to get married in 5 weeks. Insyaallah. My plan are like this.... 1. Nikah on 4th of August 2. Kenduri at Kermaat Permai on 5th of August 3. Honemoooooonnnnn from 11th August (night on the flight hehe..) until 15th August (going back to work right on 16th huhuhu) 4. Kenduri at Sg Besar on 26th of August. And my short-coming plans, i dont have the dates yet but here it is.... 1. Getting my wedding card (actually it is the back up wedding cards. there's a story about that evil jerks who is suppose to give me my paid wedding cards months ago..Shit guy!!!) 2. Sending them out. 3. Finding a new home. 4. Buying a camera 5. Buying home equipment(But i think i couldnt afford this at the moment) 6. Going to nilai 3 to fetch my Langsir and accesories for my bride room. 7. Paying Mak Andam(this is a must) 8. Doing budget. hoho...

stright to the point...i cant stop myself from writting something in this...but i do have a lot of things going on with mylife right now...and i always in the middle of situation where i want to jot down something in here...but i end up not doing it...since this is the last day of this week...i want to make it up still....so i end up writting this thing up...hehehe..eventhough there is nothing much in here...but i feel satisfied..i least i let out something..hehehe...bye

Wah ct jiwang harini...takmo kawan ct....wakakaka But i feel the need to do this today, please let me.....:'( Tak semua impian Dapat kau kota kan Daya mu setakat itu Aku tak bisa tekanmu Aku mampu secara rasional Nampak keperluan itu Dan aku tau aku kejam Andai aku terus memaksa mu Tapi air mata ini tak bisa berhenti Dan hati ku tak mampu bertahan Untuk tidak berasa sedih Aku cemuh lagu cinta itu Tak semua Cinta bisa tenang Bisa bahagia Semua itu bagai mimpi Sakit pasti datang Aku cemuh diri ini Selalu berasa sakit Selalu berasa sunyi Janji manis itu Aku sudah pegang Walaupun tutur ku bilang Tak akan jadi pasti Bisa jadi mungkin Tapi aku tak mampu Hati ku tetap berharap Langsung aku berasa dikhianati Bila janji tinggal janji Aku menyakiti Aku memang menyakiti Tapi aku ade kemahuan Tak bisakan sesiapa memahami? Tanpanya aku berasa sunyi Senyum ku keluar tapi hambar Panggilannya aku biarkan Padahal aku terlalu rindu Kerna aku tak bisa dia melihat Sakit hati ini yang bisa ditertawakan...

Something to think about? hehe.... It 641pm. And i'm still in the office. It has been almost 1 month. And i still feeling weird. I'm changing to a different person. And i think i'm seeing my new self. Hehe. But still, nobody is as perfect. I think i'm changing to be my old self back. Hmm.. Only one step ahead, but i'm now turning back already. Hehe. For instance, i have start writing to this blog again. Which i will do when i have free times. Hehe. And i have a feeling to install YM back. Oh god, i hope he fobids me from doing that. amin Ya Allah. hehe. What i gain this few years? What i lost this 1 month? In a month time u can loose a friend. In a month time, u can force ur bf to think about the future. Muahaha. In a month time, u can be nuts. In a month time, if u dont use it properly, u will be loosing all the time u had in life. Believe me, i've been there. To the point where i felt nothing worthless about me. To the time where i felt slow. To the time where...

Herm. aku tulis post ni bkn nk kutuk sesape...tp this is reality...i see it happens everyday...re-ocurring.....and mmg kadang2 aku bosan dgn bende tu.. lately..aku rasa sendiri bende tu...cume bezanya..aku blom ada sesapa lg yg kongkong hidup aku as in A HUSBAND!...Tp aku harap aku dpt menanganinya dgn bijak..begitu jugak dgn HUSBAND aku nnti...hehehe.. erm...usually....bende ni worst dekat lelaki yg MAK die housewife...aku taktau la...not all kot..depends on the husband jugak....tp bende ni mcm 2 3 kwn2 aku jugak la yg alami.. Dorg ni aku tak tau la..pendek akal ke...ape ke.....tp memang la aku geram.... Dorg expect the wife tu BIONIC WOMAN ke?? We all penat bekerja tau tak..same like you guys....We do the same now....Carik duit utk keluarga..Apalah salahnya berikan kami sedikit kelonggaran....Dont presure us....Can u? Sbb bila u pressure that woman...we woman go out...meet people....they tell us many2 stories...they listen...we listen...and we change out our thoughts....a lot......so...

I dont know why la today i'm in the mood of love..hehe.. I feel like writting a poems ke, or any other love wardings stuff, but i dont have time for that, so i just write it down simply like this. Today is my last day at my current office, PRADONET. Good Bye pradonet. hehe.. But i dont want to talk about that good bye stuff today...even though there will be no other suitable time to for it...but today i'm feeling a little love...hehehehe...so i want to talk about love...... I'm not trying to be POYO, because like i'm the only person on earth being IN LOVE..But i just want to share my feelings. I admit that, a lot of people is feeling it too, maybe they had even more wonderful feeling than me. But i just had the urge of talking about it today, if anyone would want to share their feelings too, you are sooo not welcome, get your own blog, write it down there, get a life!! Haha..just kidding.....but if anyone would want to share it here, u are most welcome....I'd like ...

Kenapa aku lame tak menulis di dalam ini blog? Muahahaha....1. takde mase. 2. takde idea. 3. takde internet...muahahahah....Yg no.3 tu aku tipu je...hehehehehe... ermm...well...masa tu ade...tp slalu pn aku dh tulis sket...pehtu aku piki 2 3 kali lagi...ermmm...malas la pulak nk post.......asek2 mende same je..merungut...merungut...merungut....tapi hari ni aku teramatla boring nya.....keje yg bos aku bg suma dh siap......aku malas nk buat elok2 cantik2...nnti die bukan nye nk appreciate...lagi die bg komen2 yg aku jd konpius...nak buat ape lepas ni nih? so aku pon malas la nk buat rajin2....ahahahaha..ntah hape2................ mggu lepas...mggu demam aku.....aku ase memang musim la kot...adik aku yg bongsu pn demam...siap aku tido ngn die lg same2..konon2 nk jaga die..alih2...aku yg demam....ahahahaha........tp skang ni kitrog dh mcm nk ok la kot....adik aku pn dh beransur pulih..hari ni die dh pegi skolah..takkan la kakak die nk ponteng kerja lg kot...ehehehe....tp ikotkan hati meman...

1. Project Officer / Coordinator 2. Programmer http://www.pradonet.com.my/home.php?op=10 Tolong sebar kan ye...terima kasih...:D

Sebelum aku lupa atau hilang segala perasaan yang sekarang ni aku tengah rasa, I think I should record it....hehehe... Actually aku memang tengah busy gila..Takde la gila, tp ade target. Setiap hari pn kena set target, kalu tak, kompom pegi keje and balik keje and abis la cerita untuk hari tu dan akan tak sabar-sabar nak tunggu hari JUMAAT!!....Hehehe...Itulah aku, dan dunia ku, yang payah berterima kasih dan sungguh payah untuk tidak terluka. Dengan sesapa pon. Even my boss....ehehehe....My boss ni bos betul aku kat opis laa.......Kire orang tak penting dalam hidup aku pun aku senang terasa... Alamak tak menyimpang, aku semakin kehilangan perasaan yang aku rasa tadi......hehehehe....... Oklah2, ni dia sebenarnya. Aku selalu tanya diri aku, AKU JELES KE? Tp kalau jeles lain tau rasa dia, rasa dia mcm kalau pakwe aku cakap tepon ngan pompuan lain. Bia la pompuan tu aku kenal, contoh macam kawan2 baik aku sendiri, ida comot ke, gurlz ke. Aku tau kalau korang bace ni mesti meluat punye. T...