Hmmm....

Something to think about? hehe....

It 641pm. And i'm still in the office. It has been almost 1 month. And i still feeling weird. I'm changing to a different person. And i think i'm seeing my new self. Hehe. But still, nobody is as perfect. I think i'm changing to be my old self back. Hmm.. Only one step ahead, but i'm now turning back already. Hehe. For instance, i have start writing to this blog again. Which i will do when i have free times. Hehe. And i have a feeling to install YM back. Oh god, i hope he fobids me from doing that. amin Ya Allah. hehe.

What i gain this few years? What i lost this 1 month? In a month time u can loose a friend. In a month time, u can force ur bf to think about the future. Muahaha. In a month time, u can be nuts. In a month time, if u dont use it properly, u will be loosing all the time u had in life. Believe me, i've been there. To the point where i felt nothing worthless about me. To the time where i felt slow. To the time where i hate myself. Eventhough i have everyone beside me. But still i'm not really happy. :(

At that point i have the whole time of the world to do almost about everything for mylife. I can go shopping at 10am in the morning. I can eat breakfast like no my bosses bussiness, and my bos still considering to up my gaji. I can easily planning to meet my bestfriend. At that time, she was too busy. That's why i have to come to her. I dont mind since her office just on my way back home. She never know where my office is. She never know, where my house is. I dont mind, cause i think that is not important. That will never change my perspective towards her. Although, when i met her, i have no time for god. Really, i felt guity to her if i am nervouse if i dont pray. Because i know she dont have the time for the whole world. So i need to give in my time. I'm writting this not to say that she dont care about my feeling. My pride or my religious. But i'm writting this to point out that, i dont mind about it. I'm dont want to be selfish to her. I can accept her as it is. :'(...

whatever it is, it is just a thought. A silly one by me. Actually i'm missing her. And i know she will not like this. Telling things about her to public. I can actually tell it directly to her. But i wont do it. Cause i need time for myself. I need time to accept this new life i was searching for about a year ago. Well goodbye then for now.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Your are Nice. And so is your site! Maybe you need some more pictures. Will return in the near future.
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